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How to Affectively Teach Your Children Not to Bully

Guest post

Bullying has recently been at the center of national attention when it comes to the country’s adolescence. However this attention has mainly revolved around the victims of bullying, while
there is also a great deal of children who are the ones doing the bullying who also need help
Finding out that their child has been harassing another student is a tough situation for parents.
In this situation, the most vital thing is to curb these behaviors as early as possible so they do
not develop into more serious issues.

In order to best help your child with these behavioral issues, your initial act should be to try and
understand what bullying is and why it happens. Bullying can be a child’s reaction to feelings
of insecurity, uncontrollable emotions/anger, or a lack of understanding that what they are
doing is wrong. For the insecure kids, making others feel uncomfortable gives them a feeling of
control and value.

This can be a tough problem to approach with your child. You must make sure that you
approach them firmly yet understandingly. They need to know that you are there for them,
but there will be consequences with the continuation of this issue. The first place you need to
look for possible causes is your home life. Does your child experience a lot of yelling and violent
behavior, do they play with their siblings over-aggressively. or other things of that nature. The
solution starts at home, with a quality example and supportive attitude.

Before you begin to understand the roots of the problem, it essential to first establish solid
lines of communication regarding the issue. Once both of you are comfortable with it, you can
really start to see what the causes are. Focus on things like who they are hanging out with,
how they conduct themselves socially, and how they are liking school. To get better insight into
these types of things, it is a good idea to contact parents of your child’s friends, any mentors
they might have, teachers, coaches and whoever else. On top of this, make sure that you are
always reinforcing the values of what is right and what is wrong.

When you have a child that is prone to these types of behaviors, you also really have to watch
how you act when you are around them. Oftentimes, children will just be acting in a way,
which they have seen their parents act. This kind of bullying can easily be prevented if you are
always conscious of how you act around the kids, vigilantly trying to teach them by example.
These situations can often be very hurtful to the entire family, and that is why it is important
to always remember that there is help out there for those who seek it. Teachers, school
administrators, counselors, therapists, and doctors are always a good resource for your child’s
benefit. Remaining patient and loving throughout a situation like this quite tiring for a parent,
but the result is a happier and healthier child.

Tyler Clark works for Liahona Academy in Hurricane, Utah and has spent many years helping families cope with child and teenage bullying.